"Nobody likes you when you're 23"- Blink 182
Throughout our years in school, we are always told to study hard in order to get into college. Go to a good college and work harder, get an amazing internship, land a full time job, struggle to live in a big city and the rest should fall into place. Well.... society forgot to leave out one big message to all post college grads:
HOW AWKWARD THIS TRANSITION REALLY IS!!!
Americans have been hit with one of the worst economic times we've seen since the Great Depression. Unfortunately, college students have been hit harder than ever and as a California State University graduate, the struggle has been more than REAL than ever! The California State budget cuts hit colleges and took away classes making it next to impossible to find a way to graduate let alone find the money to do so since the tuition was NUTS. Well, after this sob story, recent college graduates were thrown into the work place. The problem with this is that the credentials of a California State degree were not as impressive and the Baby Boomers that should be retiring cannot afford to leave. So that generation of people are not leaving their amazing jobs anytime soon. (Hahaha) I find this hilarious since this new generation entering the work force has been pushed back into jobs a high school student is qualified for. After barely graduating college, I was blessed with being offered a paid internship at a large convention center working their events. My little sister in my sorority has a contact at the event center which helped me into this amazing opportunity.
The rest was my journey in my awkward early 20's. People seem to always leave this chapter out in their memoires or reality shows. Nobody ever tells you how awkward, discouraging, difficult, and crazy this transition is into adulthood. Self-made millionaires always tell you how hard it was coming from the streets and then coming up wit a great idea and boom, they are wealthy. Actors who just get discovered at the coffee shop when the director are just trying to come up with the next big movie idea. The athletes that worked so hard to get to the championship and won. Why did society leave out the terrible details of the millionaires addicted to cocaine at the peak of their great idea? The actors who stalked all movie directors so they "could be at the right place, at the right time". The athletes who got recruited from the dude who gave them steroids. The general public wants to hear the Cinderella story but I want to know the REAL story.
Well thanks to me, I won't leave anything out in my journey of awkward and crazy 20's! You are welcome :)
Secret #1: It's not about WHAT you know, but rather WHO you know.
Spend those crazy partying years in college in order to meet as many people as possible. Don't burn bridges, make friends. Join as many clubs, teams, organizations, alumni associations, and meet with professors. People want to help nice people so leave a great impression. Don't be dumb and NOT party in college, just be smart about NOT keeping the reputation of 'that girl that always throws up after doing a keg stand at the frat house' DON'T BE THAT GIRL. KEEP IT TOGETHER and throw up on the side of the house where no one can see you. Work your ass off while you still have the ability to stay awake until 3am and wake up for class at 8am because years down the road you won't ever talk about that one time you got a good nights rest. "I live for the nights I can't remember, with the people that I won't forget"- Aubrey Graham aka Degrassi's Jimmy aka that one rapper
An example of this is Justin Bieber's best friend, Alfredo Flores who is best known for directing and editing the film, Believe and is now writing, editing and directing a number of other projects. It's all about who you know!
Secret #2: You are an adult at 18, learn to do your own laundry
Last time I checked, your parents will not be living with you forever, so it's time to be a little independent. You might get yourself wifed up but don't give your significant other the job of doing your chores. Do your own damn laundry! You're a grown up and you need to learn how to fold a shirt, iron a pair of pants without burning them and know which pieces of clothing to put in the dryer or hang dry.
Don't go out and buy more underwear, just spend every Sunday night to do a couple small loads of laundry per week instead of 15,876 loads of laundry every 3 months, you're gross.
Secret #3: Learn how to cook (kinda)
Become an expert chef! Well, learn how to make at least one -five amazing dishes! I promise you will thank me later for this. Not everyone has the amazing touch in the kitchen, but if you know how to make Kraft Mac & Cheese, you know how to boil water and cook pasta. Step it up a notch and cook spaghetti. (I believe in you!) By taking the time to learn a new recipe, you might even learn about foods you've never tried before. You can also impress a date with your sweet new cooking skills. It gives you something to do, you're busy much like the rest of the young 20 something's, but abs start in the kitchen. So start.. right now. Get a Pinterest (even guys have them) bounce around some ideas and learn how to make one freaking bomb dish.
Secret #4: Learn about investments
Nobody ever told me that I was already behind on investing at the age of 22?! I was working as a server my first year out of college and was working a double shift (Two 6 hour shifts) I had a few minutes to kill and walked into a Barnes and Noble. All I was focused on was working and making money. I wanted a new car and my own place but I also wanted to set myself up for the future. I wandered into the personal finance section since it was next to the magazines and came across a large amount of books about investing for young adults. These people had something I wanted, success at a young age. I became obsessed with personal finances and self-help books.
So here's a quick crash course;
Become a customer at a credit union (Better interest rates)
Open a Roth IRA account
Learn about the stock market
Buy and spend within your means
A savings acct is as good as digging a hole and putting cash in it
Put a small amount away each month & watch it grow over time
Goal: buy property
This should be your guide to life right now
Secret #5: Look like an "adult"
(or just fake it til you make it)
Buy interview attire. Just one blazer, one pair of slacks, appropriate shoes and a button up shirt. Be a real person and realize that you will have to go on an interview in your lifetime. Don't complain about this, it has to happen. If you're bank account cannot afford a Tom Ford suit or a new Michael Kors blazer, realize that majority of people are not wearing that to their first interview anyway. Use some money from your graduation from that aunt in Arkansas you never knew you had and invest in yourself.
Nobody is asking you to throw out your crop tops, high waisted shorts, bro tanks or vans shoes. You can keep them for all your music festivals you will still be attending with your friends that are still in college. But you should get rid of some pieces in your closet that have been there since high school and have been lingering around. That awkward looking lavender silk sophomore year homecoming dress needs to go, like yesterday it should've been out of your closet. Think of this as a new chapter in your book and start over. Change is good, that's how you learn to grow! Plus you don't want too look as awkward as you did in middle school. Best believe, change is a good thing!
Secret #6: Go to the gym
You don't need to sign up for a personal trainer to come into your home, but you need to get in shape. My first year of college I came home during Christmas break and realized that I gained some weight due to the unlimited food at the caf and the alcohol. By some weight, I mean 25 freaking pounds! I decided instead of having other people make fun of me, I did it to myself first I named my freshman 15, Francesca aka "Franny"... ps. she's a B#$^%!!!
I would always joke around about how it was her fault I ate that chocolate cake, or the entire bag of chips from Costco or even the 2 double double burgers and dozen of Krispy Kreme donuts in one night. (true story) After college you don't have any excuse to NOT get into shape. I also feel like it is our generation that hits the gym the hardest. We are all about clean eating, gyming it out and crossfit. Being fit will help boost your metabolism and self esteem, help you meet people, gives you something to do, and make you look bangin' for your Vegas reunion trip with your sorority sisters. Some gyms offer special services like unlimited tanning, pool access, personal training or even classes like yoga, zumba or spin! Even if you don't have money for a gym, make time out of your day to be active. Plan to go hiking with friends on the weekends when it's nice outside and the gym seems like a second home.
Secret #7: You can still have fun
Who says you can't go out with friends to the bars? You can have a few margaritas at Taco Tuesday with your co-workers. You cannot be kicking back 12 tequila shots back with your boss after work. Learn what is appropriate and what isn't. You should've learned your limit in college after that terrible night of drinking vodka from a plastic handle and having to take a midterm the next day. Those were your college days and you had the excuse that you were young and dumb. I cannot say that in your awkward 20's you won't have a bad night or two or three. Just remember you have a lot more to lose than you did in school.
Just an amusing easy read that makes it easy to laugh at your situation instead of cry
While you're at it, read this one too!
Secret #8: Clean up your social media
Looking like you're about to join the convent and cleaning your social media don't have to be the same thing. Employers are looking to social media to get to know who you really are instead of that resume that tells them what you want them to know. You're resume could say you graduated cum laude from USC with an econ major and 3 year's experience volunteering at the humane society. But if your twitter name is BiGbOOtyHOE_69 with a picture of Lil' Wayne pouring champagne showers on you and your friends who got into his VIP section in LA, you should know now that you might not get the job of your dreams because of this. Don't blame Lil' Wayne or any other member of YMCMB because they are living their dreams and you cannot get a job. Nobody in the real world cares if you made out with Shemar Moore from Criminal Minds. He may be hotter than majority of the men you've come in contact with but unless he's putting a ring on your finger or signing you onto his payroll, then nobody cares. It's a good story but it won't get you far in life. I'm trying to help you! You have a few options in the matter, change your name. I have mine set as Kastania Victoria even though I'm one of the only 'Kastania's' in the world but it's a good example. I took off a few pictures of alcohol. I frequently go wine tasting and have pictures with me and a wine glass. You're legally allowed to drink so that seems fine. If all of your pictures are of alcohol then maybe tone it down. The embarrassing pictures you were tagged in that one year in Santa Barbara for Halloween and you made out with a ginger should probably be hidden from you timeline. Even if your friends always remind you and its still a very bad blurry memory now don't let him Ron Wesley or Prince Harry haunt you on your career path. Start with the ones you use the least, Facebook, Twitter, Instagram, Tumblr, Vine, Pinterest etc.
The classiest woman in Hollywood strikes again and parties too hard under a table? Great example as to why she can't get a damn job! She's crazy! Clean up your social media sites or you will get too drunk, party with Lindsay, get a DUI, do some coke, get a record and then have even bigger problems.
Secret #9: Plan mini vacations or big ones
If you seriously have no idea what to do after college and too scared to move back in with your parents (it's not that bad) then you should travel! If you need some spiritual wake up call to help you decide what to do with your life then travel the world! No better way for self discovery and appreciation than this. Work your butt off at some retail or restaurant job and save up every penny. You might not have studied abroad in school but you can still get some great deals since you just left college and you can finally live the dream of visiting Paris. If you are part of the 1% of recent college grads that is employed, then plan mini vacations on the 3 day weekends to keep you from going insane. Your sleep schedule is not ready to be waking up at 5am for work because you still go to bed at 2am because studying for finals has completely screwed you up for life. Mini vacations give you something to look forward to while you work in that entry level call center job.
Interexchange.org is an organization for 18-30 year olds to Work & Travel, Au Pair or even Teach English Abroad. They are associated with a number of different countries. This offers a great opportunity for people who are a little stuck in the rut.
EF College Break is another organization for student enrolled in undergraduate programs or even just recently out of school looking to travel on a budget and with a group. They set up tours, housing and sometimes even include the flight costs within their package.
Secret #10: Try new things
Get a new hobby! Take a dance class, learn how to do coding to make an app, make a blog (what what!) read a book a week, learn to play the guitar, act in a play or secret #3- Learn to cook. Always keep learning or else your mind won't expand. This helps you to learn new things about yourself, helps you meet new people and experience exciting opportunities. I was in such a funk after school, I wanted to feel like I was really living my life. I saved up some money and went on a trip to Mexico, went skydiving and attended the American Music Awards all in a matter of a few months. Crazy, I know! But the experiences and memories were once in a lifetime and I planned each one. I definitely recommend this #10 secret because job hunting puts you in a bad mood and can be so discouraging after so many months of rejection. These small experiences will help you to keep your head up!
Create a bucket list and start to check things off each week, month or year. It helps you to be adventurous, stick to a plan and try new things!
*** So I'm only 23 and have found these little secrets to be helpful in life that nobody mentioned to tell me once I entered the 'adult world'. I'll start to update and expand on these little secrets of life to help you through your journey or someone you might know. It makes life easier to conquer because our generation has been screwed over, it's time to stand up for what we believe in and own life! (GET IT BOO BOO'S)
*** Send me a message or email me at Kastaniac@gmail.com if you have any questions, concerns or comments about how to expand this list of secrets :)
